For internal awareness only.

Good evening patrons,

As the 2025 season comes to a close, the statistics once again prove—without a doubt—that our leader, Vinnie, was padding the stat sheet and dominating. As usual.

We now look ahead to 2026 with optimism and excitement as Vinnie assumes full control and ownership of the elusive, fair-taled “A Team.” With this transition comes a limited number of openings, created by retirement and by members who have not demonstrated what it takes to remain at this level.

Retirement Announcement

After an incredible 23-year run, Ron “Druncle Ron” Marchand officially retires from the A Team.

Founder. Pioneer. Visionary.
He started our beloved group after helping Margaret in birthing the greatest specimen to ever walk the earth, and built it on devotion, grit, and a lifelong goal of simply trying to keep up with the great one—Vinnie.

We thank him for his service.

Status Reviews

• Ronnie — does he even ski?

• Hayden Weedenkeller — so elusive he might as well be Helen Keller; reportedly unable to see himself since acquiring “some butt.”

Prospective Additions

As we move the team forward, we’d like to introduce potential prospects competing for roster spots:

• Bret “G-Force / Downhill” Kitna

• Jake “The Slick Head” Montgomery

• Dom "the only macedo" Maccedo

With only two open spots, plus the highly sought-after and never-used Reserve Spot, competition will be tight. Unfortunately, someone will not make the team.

Evaluation Criteria

Aside from the automatic selections (myself and Brian), slope stats will be tracked, counted, and reviewed throughout the season to determine final placement.

Performance will matter. Consistency will matter. Excuses will not.

Hayden, Brett, Ronnie, Dom, and Jake — we wish you all the best of luck.

Sincerely,
Management